Quick and Dirty Movie Reviews
December 29th, 2009 — Action, Adventure, Mystery
Basic Plot: The game’s afoot, and Holmes is on the chase!
Outburst: Entertaining wit, engaging fights, and a clever Sherlock concept make this a fun movie. I had a few small quibbles with minor details, but overall was vastly pleased.
/DVD (3 of 3 stars) — It’s just a fun sort of movie. While not technically steampunk, I think fans of steampunk and/or Holmes will want to add this to their DVD collections as well.
December 12th, 2009 — Comedy, Martial Arts
Basic Plot: Scrawny kid who watches too many kung-fu movies is magically transported to another realm in which he must return a mystical staff to the Monkey God.
Outburst: I’ve seen more logical plots on pornos. This is just a thinly veiled attempt to string together intense martial arts scenes between Jet Li and Jackie Chan, with some hot fighting Asian girls thrown into the mix. It’s pretty awesome.
/CULT (2 of 3 stars) — If you love comedic kung-fu movies, you’ll find this movie a fun classic.
Official Website: The Forbidden Kingdom
Wikipedia: The Forbidden Kingdom
August 23rd, 2009 — Martial Arts
Basic Plot: A fighting monk must find the new protector for a magical scroll. Based on an obscure comic book.
Outburst: What starts as a fun, fighting frolic develops into hokey nonsense plagued by the bad acting of supporting characters. It makes no sense for him to get the girl at the end. Why do the bad guys have to be Nazis? Who scripted these girls? The point of any woman in a kungfu movie is to look hot, kick butt, and take names, not make me cringe when they try to act.
/CULT (1 of 3 stars) – It is obligatory that all Chow Yun-Fat fans watch (and possibly own) this movie, and it’s a good time waster if you are a kungfu movie fan. For the rest of us, there are much better movies out these days.
June 21st, 2009 — Action, Adventure, Science Fiction
IMDB Star Trek
Basic Plot: Your basic Star Trek movie plot.
Outburst: As a born cynic, I could probably nitpik all day about trivial things (why does the Romulan ship look like something out of the Matrix; is all that Uhura ‘romantic interest’ nonsense necessary) but that would just be my fault-finding nature on overdrive. The movie certainly paid lip service to its fans (whether Trekker or Trekkie) in a humoristic series of lighthearted camps that didn’t pretend to be anything other than fan-pleasers… and yet I was still pleased by them, ridiculously so. Who would want a Trek movie where Kirk doesn’t tangle with a hot alien girl, get into fist-fights with alien baddies, and no one gets saved ‘unexpectedly’ just in the nick of time? Those aren’t even spoilers on my part; they are so much a part of the franchise.
And just as I was enormously pleased by the slightly campy, action-packed futuristic fun, so too will you be, even if you are only a moderate Trek fan. The latest edition of the popular series is a romp of a movie and certain to be a real crowd pleaser.
/DVD (3 of 3 stars) — A totally awesome movie you should definitely check out in theaters AND add to your Star Trek collection.